The Problems of the Marquette Dining Experience (or, Edward Sharpe & The Magnetic Zeros suck; or, I'm Really Grumpy and I Apologize For The Following Choice Words I Have That Are Bound To Only Make Me Seem Like A Big Doucher; or, I'm Really Sorry You Like The Song "Home", I'm Just A Music Nerd With Too Much Time On My Hands)

It's always difficult writing for this blog, usually because everyone and anyone who reads this is already in my class, and so trying to recount previous classes just seems like it could be really redundant (which isn't the most attractive adjective in the English language). Nevertheless, I'm laying in my bed, listening to the Girls EP, Broken Dreams Club (which is probably the best short release of the year), and trying not fall asleep--this is only significant because I have to (a) piss like a race horse, (b) finish this post.

ANYWAY, I'm pretty excited to go back home (HUGE DIGRESSION: speaking of home, I really hate the band, Edward Sharpe & The Magnetic Zeros. They're terrible, inessential, and more overrated than Kings of Leon--who suck even more. The song Home by said band is probably one of the worst songs to have come out within the past year. If I had a dollar for every girl in Uggs and a Northface who sang that godforsaken song, Haiti would be the richest country in the Western Hemisphere. Note to record labels: have a back and forth duet between a man and a woman concerning cheesy, brainless emotions; you will make fucking millions while exposing thousands of kids who think they listen to good music. END DIGRESSION.), where non-Sodexo food and a larger bed await. Don't get me wrong, Marquette's food prowess--or lack there of--and use of beds that kids in the third world would find uncomfortable are charming in the Stockholm Syndrome kind of way, but it'd be nice to get a change of pace. I'm human, I can only handle MU "food" for periods no longer than 4 weeks; at that point, I might purposely eat tapeworm eggs just so I don't have to worry about intestinal problems (yes, I realize I'm talking about fairly personal stuff right here, but it needs to be said).

How my intestines (after eating NORMAL food) would look if they were represented by a cartoon character:

 "Herp Derp, m3 l1k3y g00d füd."

How I'm single is beyond me...